No, friends, that's not the record this sorry excuse for a ball club will have to post the rest of the way to break even this season.
Rather, it's the running tally of exercise sets and walks to work, respectively, that I've racked up while allowing the muscle strain in my lower right leg to heal. Rest assured that Your Humble Narrator will not be invoking a piddling little high-ankle tweak toward the end of excusing himself from his stated summer mission. A little more ice, a little more Ben-Gay, a steady diet of Advil and a new pair of tennis shoes and he'll be right back in the game — and just in time for the yearly D.C. wave of ungodly, oppressive heat. Gonna be a fun June, that's for sure!
Anyway, since moaning about the Orioles has long since passed the point of fun grumbling and entered into the realm of the massively redundant, here's some other news:
This photo comes courtesy of one Pat Ostrye, who attended the May 26 contest at which the Baltimore brass apparently decided to wholeheartedly embrace the laughingstock-of-the-league image the Birds have cultivated by way of their play on the field this season.
I'd say more about it — and there's a lot to say; just look at the position ol' Bobblehead Reimold's assuming to, er, make that catch — but I can't put it better than Pat himself, who writes:
Also, when I got home and opened it, it was broken. They were basically handing out metaphors for the Orioles' season last night.