Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Fantasy injury update

Mike Laws (undisclosed lower-body injury) walked to work yesterday but will refrain from doing so again pending improvement in his condition, which is not thought to be serious but is somewhat bothersome to the lad, TheOriolesPlan.blogspot.com's Le'Chaim Slaw reports.

SPIN: While the mystery ailment, which is believed to involve the tibialis anterior, could derive from any of various stressful activities to which this jackass subjects himself on a weekly basis — an awkward decelerative maneuver during today's 6 a.m. pickup-hockey session at the Kettler Capitals Iceplex, perchance, or improperly performed lunges the night preceding (to say nothing of the admittedly idiotic beach bonfire-jumping competition of Friday last in Ocean City, Md.) — it is hoped by both the Blueliners of Laurel, Md.'s Gardens Ice House and the Wombats of the aforementioned Kettler Iceplex that the center/winger-cum-tragically devoted Orioles fanatic will recover in time for this weekend's slate of (largely meaningless, early-season) men's league hockey match-ups.

ADVICE: We wouldn't bench the kid just yet, though do keep an eye on him; this sort of whiny, self-obsessed drivel points to his being a more or less total pussy.

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